PEOPLE WHO NEED PEOPLE

Who doesn't like to feel needed?

Isn't it a wonderful feeling, to have someone need you?

Not in a NEEDY or clingy sort of way, but rather...in the sense that we bring something to the table that enriches someone's life for the BETTER.

You see, I've experienced shaming around the concept of NEEDING someone.

"You don't need him," they judged. Or..."You can do it all and have it all...on your own. You don't need a man."

That feminist, independent woman badge that people chose to flaunt...I cannot understand it for the life of me. Sure, you want to proclaim to the world that "sisters are doing it for themselves." Oh, but alas, this is where feminism got it all wrong. You see, the problem with this is the fact that women have pushed men away. GOOD men, for that matter.

All too often, I hear girlfriends say to me "I can't find a good man. All they want is sex. The good ones are all taken, The good looking men are either gay or married. The worthwhile men are taken. The only ones left are the players, duds or deadbeats.

Here is where yours truly steps in to raise the debate. The problem with these women who wear the MISS INDEPENDENT badge are the same ones crying poor over the lack of good men in society. No, it's not a lack of good men...but rather, a lack of GRATEFUL WOMEN. Sister, you're doing it all wrong. You want to scream to the masses that you can fix your own broken toilet, you can carry the heavy bags of groceries up those steep steps, you don't need help with the broken light bulb or help paying your electricity bill, etc.You want to appear all strong and macho. See your problem? You got all the "hustle" to make things happen, and to pay all your bills and get bragging rights to "have it all" and do it all...but you've forgotten one simple concept: MEN WANT TO PLAY THE HERO.

Don't you ever wonder why romance novels still make 1 billion in sales annually? Because men still want to play the hero, even in modern day. We've forgotten how to RECEIVE, so we've worn ourselves out GIVING too much...we over work ourselves, wear our bodies to the bone til we're on the verge of collapse. We think we're playing it smart by overextending ourselves and doing it all.

Needing someone's help is a good trait to have. This works both ways. Sometimes, a man does not want to ask for a woman's help, either. Perhaps it makes him feel less of a man, But we need one another, and it is a beautiful thing indeed. That's why it doesn't hurt to ask for help. You won't be seen as "weak" or incompetent. You'll bond closer with those who care about you. Go ahead, try it and see. You might just be amazed.

People who need people...are the luckiest people in the world (as the song goes).

Cheering for you always,

RR xo

BE A HERO IN SOMEONE'S LIFE

In our daily encounters, we have many chances to make a difference in someone's life. Do we take these opportunities when they are presented? Or do we rush on by in our self-focused little haze?

My own personal joy comes from giving to others, with no expectation of return. That $20 I slipped to the woman on the street who looked down and out? It gave me a rush of adrenaline like nothing else. Just knowing I may never run into her again, is remarkable itself. The beaming smile on her face affirmed that I'd made an impact. The added bonus was an hour later at a lotto counter, the machine went off with an instant win of $100. Now, THAT is something else. I don't expect miracles like this in the moment, but I gladly welcome them.

The lunch I covered for a friend "just because"? Well, a flutter of joy filled my heart when I paid the bill. No score keeping here. It's not authentic. Don't do that. Just give. It's a big boomerang effect, it comes back to you in profound ways you would never imagine.

Giving is joyful. It blesses the receiver, makes a huge difference (not always monetarily) and in turn, sends back a ripple of blessing and abundance to the giver. You just never know who you're impacting, what life you are making better by the random act of your kindness.

Being a hero in someone's life doesn't take much. It could be a favor granted, helping someone load a sofa on a truck to their new home. It might be just lending an ear to someone who lost her husband to cancer, or a friend who put her ailing mother into a long term care facility. These life changing moments hit hard, they can be very taxing emotionally and mentally on the people involved. Our friends and colleagues need us. Often, the ones who appear rock solid on the outside are actually the ones falling apart behind the scenes. They're feeling a river of tears course down their face, after a long day, sitting alone in an empty room. Believe me, I have been there. It takes a prayer and a strong heart to feel that wave of exhaustion ride out.

Who will you reach today, in your busy life? Will you strike up a conversation with that co worker on your smoke break at work? You know the one, she looks hard on the outside, rarely smiles. You think she is just "unfriendly" when really, she is going through hell. No one ever asks. They assume she is a snob or just a cold person. Go ahead, take a chance and send her a smile or word of encouragement. I have reached people on a whim like this. The floodgates that open are truly astounding!

Recently, doing a buy and sell for household items, a woman who is a repeat customer came to me. She stood in my driveway and poured her heart out to me. Her daughter had been murdered. The magnitude of trust and connection in our conversation really hit me like a tsunami. Wow, a total stranger was sharing her biggest defining life moment...I was blessed and honored by the gift of our exchange. She has come back a few more times, just to chat. She told me something that warmed me all over: "since the death of my daughter, I have become a hermit. I rarely go anywhere, except for the part time job I work. But YOU my dear, are someone I could go to lunch with. You're special. You actually care. The others don't have a clue."

Misty eyes here, as I write this entry. The Universe has brought me so many profound experiences, in 2015 alone. It blows my mind. You could say it's because I have an open mind and very receptive heart.

Just last night, someone asked, "how is it after all you've been through, that you remain open?" My response was simple. "I'm not a victim, but a VICTOR. Those scars I bear, they are just stepping stones, promptly me onward to the next BIG MIRACLE in my life.

You'd be amazed by what's coming to you...if you remain open and keep your heart warm. Please promise me you won't become bitter. It blocks the flow of abundance. It does you absolutely no good at all. You have so much to give, so many gifts to share with the wounded and lost who are searching for guidance.

If you will take a chance today -- BE A HERO IN SOME PERSON'S LIFE-- it will make a world of difference. Trust me.

Cheering for you always,

xo RR xo